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Posts Tagged ‘determination’

yellow brick road

Is this your yellow brick road?

Are the goals you are working on yours?

Does it feel like the road is paved in gold and it seems all you have to do is dream it and it becomes your reality or is it like slogging around the base of a mountain but not quite getting your footing to climb it or you can’t find the path?

One reason may be that someone else set the goal for you. Not consciously but maybe they want something for you more than you want it.

Even without knowing it you may have set a goal you felt you “should” set based on someone else’s beliefs or desires for you. It either overwhelms you or even under-whelms you. Hard to put your heart into something like that isn’t it?

Does your goal feel somewhat pressured, not in a good way.   Do you feel pushed towards it, vs. drawn towards it? Like you cannot imagine not getting to the end result!

You may even want the goal but there may not have been enough thought or planning around it. Reality may or may not have an impact on your goal but put those glasses on to check it out if necessary. This is not to burst your balloon, but looking at all your options is still valuable.

Anything can be done if there is enough desire and energy to move you forward. If you have been less that “there” lately, then start with a smaller yet S-M-A-R-T goal.  One you know you CAN achieve with a small stretch then make each next goal bigger so that as you take those achievable steps, you are creating an environment of energy that will make even the seemingly impossible, POSSIBLE!

I too have had a past full of goal setting where I did well, then not so well. In hindsight I realize that my aversion to goal-setting was absolutely from getting to a place of setting goals that felt I “should” do, it would look good, I would feel better about myself, etc, etc,etc.

What I know today is that a goal has to be driven by your Vision. The one YOU want for yourself. The goals are the stepping stones towards it. You will feel drawn towards your goals and Vision in a way that feels like that path of gold off to OZ. All you need do is dream it, then be S-M-A-R-T about it!

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Ingredients

Hmmm…Whats Missing?

Setting goals gives us a feeling of starting anew.

But if our goals aren’t created properly, we are setting ourselves up for failure right from the start. So next time you create your goals, add this additional element to ensure your success.

Not only do you want to write them down, look at them daily, and take deliberate action toward achieving them, but you also want to visualize them as if they have already happened.

So… Want to lose 20 pounds? Visualize yourself 20 pounds lighter.

Want to make $100K this year? Visualize yourself putting $10K cheques in the bank each and every month.

Want to pay off all your debt? Visualize your balance sheet saying $0 due.

Visualizing your goals is the missing ingredient to achieving what yo want to accomplish.

Enjoy the experience, and enjoy your vision coming to be!

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Les Rivaux de Painful Gulch

A Little Motivation

Pain doesn’t tell you when you ought to stop. Pain is the little voice in your head that tries to hold you back because it knows if you continue you will change.

Don’t let it stop you from being who you can be. Exhaustion tells you when you ought to stop. You only reach your limit when you can go no further.

– Unknown

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Feet On the Map

Action is fascinating because action is habitual.

You can be the habit of action or the habit of inaction – both having dramatically different results.

The more you create the habit of action, the more action you take.

And the more you create the habit of inaction, the harder it is to get started.

Which habit are you in? What holds you back? All it takes it the first step. Then another step. No one ever said it has to be the right step because you can adjust along the way. It just has to be a step, and all the rest will work itself out.

What is the moral of the story? Don’t wait until your perfect plans are made and your fears are gone. The perfect time is now. Take the first step, then make the other steps a habit.

 

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Think big

Think big (Photo credit: m-c)

The most important thing you can do to change your life is to change your thoughts. 

I know, it’s easier said than done I know.  We all have a pattern of how we process our thoughts.  For some of us this pattern serves us better than others. But the good news is that you can change it.

How do your thoughts serve you?  Can you notice them and choose what to do with them in the moment?   Or do you let your thoughts control you?  Just because a thought comes in doesn’t mean it is true, and doesn’t mean you have to think it, believe it or accept it.

Try to be more conscious of your thoughts,just like when your stomach growls for food.  And when your thoughts come, determine how they are serving you and what to do with them.  Then do it.

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Cover of "8 Women"

Cover of 8 Women

[tweetmeme source=trcoaching only_single=false]The time is NOW for a NEW YOU!

 

Is it time for a change?

Are you stuck?

Do you know which way to go next?

Are you at a crossroads in your life as a woman of a certain age?

I am launching a NEW Group Coaching Event open to the first 8 women ready for a change.

Starting February 21, 2011!

I am sure some of you are asking what Coaching is.

The short answer of what it is and is not…

Coaching is a supported self-guided path to change.

Whatever change you are ready for I will meet you there and co-create a plan for moving forward.

Coaches are in the asking business and that is what I am here to do!

Therapy can deal with past pain, whereas mentoring and consulting shows you how by an expert.

I will not give medical advice.

 

Why would you participate, you ask?

Participants from the last session will share with you some of their reasons.

“I have been able to clarify what is important to me and make decisions more consciously…I have a better & more clear idea of what makes me “tick”. I have also increased my self-acceptance. Impact: A safe enough environment to help me have the courage to tell the truth about myself to myself. Anne B.

“The group provided me with the opportunity to meet fabulous women on a similar journey & our get-togethers inevitably led to a heightened level of personal understanding. It was a blast!” Helene S. 

“It helped me set priorities and motivate me towards working on my goals. I am more assertive in communicating my needs. I thought it was a great workshop! Tammy is a great facilitator!” Veronica P.

“These women created a bond with each other and felt safe to share their inner-most feelings. Women supporting women has worked throughout the generations. Today’s need is no less valuable. Bring a friend to share this special time with knowing you will be the better for it.”
Tammy Rowland

Things we will discuss:

Self-Discovery ~Relationships~ Intuition; following your gut instinct ~Empowerment ~ Joy~Feeling Balanced~
Get clarity around your Needs and Values ~ Strategies for what’s next ~
How to transform your life to have more of what you want

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Starting: Monday’s February 21st, 2011 to March 28th, 2011
We meet for 6 weeks from 7:00 pm–9:00 pm – Location TBA
Register: Call Tammy Rowland @ 514-918-5476
Cost after February 14th – $250.00
Interac Money Transfer & Cheques accepted payable to:
9044-9646 Quebec Inc.

**There is a $50 discount upon registering before February 14th so call now!

Payment must be cleared to hold your spot as it is first come first registered.
One on One Coaching sessions also available

Contact Tammy Rowland (514)918-5476 tammyrowland@bell.net
Certified Life Coach ~ CoachU Graduate ~ International Coach Federation Member

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[tweetmeme source=trcoaching only_single=false]Happy New Year!
What do you want to do with 2011?
Have you made room in it for some positive change – a gift to yourself?
Invest some time to discover your passion with the thought-provoking questions below.
Feel free to share them with your friends and family as I have.

Your friendship and support has meant a great deal to me this year and for that I thank you from the bottom of a very grateful heart.

May 2011 be full of Peace, Love and more Joy than you could possibly keep to yourself.

What was the smartest decision you made in 2010?

What is the biggest piece of unfinished business still left from 2010?

What choices did you make in 2010 that you do not want to repeat?

Who made an important impact on you in 2010?

Who do you want to thank or express gratitude/appreciation to? How?

What relationship needs more attention in 2011?

What aspects of your health, appearance and habits need more attention in 2011?

What word would best describe your finances in 2010?
Where did you waste money in 2010?

What area of your finances do you want most to clear up in 2011?

What one thing do you need to do or say that would have made 2010 feel complete?

What did you learn about yourself in 2010 that will help guide you in the New Year?

What value/passion did you live this year?

For what problems must you ask for solutions?

In what areas would you benefit with more education?

Did you feel like you had enough support in 2010?
If not, where could you have used more support?

Are you willing to ask for that support and how will you do so?

Did you have fun in 2010? How can you bring more fun into your life?

What was your biggest high in 2010? What was your low for 2010?

Did you have a theme for the year?

If so how did it guide you? Moving on to 2011… My theme for 2011 is…

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[tweetmeme source=trcoaching only_single=false]Eve has been struggling with her weight for years so it makes perfect sense that actually getting to the bottom if it all takes more than one week! Last week her defensiveness with the weigh in staff member came from her feelings about all this change. A way to stand up for herself, I suppose. It was not so surprising that the following week there was no criticism for what was in her food journal even though it wasn’t perfect.

Recently as Eve has been more attentive to her weight loss she hoped for some notice from others, like her mom who knew of her recent efforts. It had frustrated and actually hurt that her mom said nothing at all about it. This week while sitting over coffee her mom mentioned how terrific Eve looked and was sorry she hadn’t quite figured out how to say it before now. Even though Eve was grateful for the encouragement that mom had noticed, she realized that it was no longer important if others noticed, but more so what she herself thought and felt. Eve said, “I feel in control of my life again! I feel good!”

Where Eve felt neglected by a good friend in the recent past, she found out it was not about her but her friend had been going through something and was now ready to talk to her about it. These things confirmed to Eve that it is not always about her but that maybe she just has gotten lonely and missed her friends company.  

Why are these things all different today?

 I just feel better about myself and don’t need others to fill a void I once felt I had.

The biggest change to be revealed! Eve’s entire life she has never mentioned her weight…to ANYONE! The joke in her family was that if they wanted to know how much she weighed they would have to do it upon her death, but not before. There was a moment this week – let’s say an opportunity for her to be completely honest.

Eve and her beloved were sitting with friends over coffee (lots of coffee dates this week!) and for some reason that never happened before someone asked about her weight. He was most concerned about his daughter’s health and had noticed her steady weight loss. It happened like this.

Eve, do you weight about 140 pounds?

No, actually 145!

She saw her husband’s brow lift and thought he was going to fall off his chair.

I asked her how she felt about saying it out loud.

“Who cares accept yourself and who are you fooling except yourself. He was shocked that I said my weight, but didn’t care about the number. He said that he doesn’t, never did and never will ever care about how much I weigh and that I have to deal with it. I thought it was a big deal and it wasn’t. I could hardly wait to tell you!”

“I have had tough things to deal with and I am more aware of my reactions to them. Worry has been an issue for me forever about my kids when they were young and now that they are adults as well as my husband’s work. Today I am better equipped to deal with worry and am handling it better…whichever way the wind blows. I am better at shaking myself out of bad or heavy thoughts. I have become amazing at ‘you may be right!’ I ask myself ‘How important is it for me to be right?’ Who really cares anyway?”

“Honesty really has removed my defensiveness and need to be right!” This is a great way to end today and I know that Eve has more growth in front of her, but the big stuff for now is behind her and the real work is staying on top of it until it becomes just who she is. If any of these issues that Eve has gone through sound familiar to you, a coach may be of assistance to you. Drop me a line and let me know what you think and how honest are you with yourself today?

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[tweetmeme source=trcoaching]“Being great at what you do isn’t just something you do for the organization you work for- it’s a gift you give yourself.”
Robin Sharman

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[tweetmeme source=trcoaching only_single=false]After being honest with me last week about her REAL “closet eating” issues, today we find out how she worked through her week with food.

The first thing Eve told me was that she wrote down everything, not leaving one morsel out! As she has been weighing is at a weight loss clinic for several months, she went in with all of it in hand. Eve had a day where she needed a fix and ate a box of chocolates and wrote it down as well.  The woman on the other side of the counter was quite critical about what her week. Eve went on to describe the woman as not so perfect herself and somewhat pushy, cocky and arrogant.

I asked if the woman may have been reacting to her defensiveness about what she had done. Quite possibly she said, as they had always been kind in the past. It had been uncomfortable to show her actions on paper to someone else which made her feel like she had to defend herself. Calming down she was able to mention her commitment to herself and felt more power and on another occasion had only a sliver of pie with no desire to sneak more. The sign on her fridge door was a constant reminder that it was “Just for Today” she needed to stay focused on with food.

Had she any new thoughts this week as she moved along her path to being honest with herself? Eve mentioned that she had been a pleaser all her life and worked very hard to make others happy. Now she realized that she is a good person, and needs to make her priority her own happiness. The sign that she was “good enough” last week was a great reminder as well. Eve says she walks a little prouder and everything she does is important, not menial. Everyone’s job is equally important.

Life is “ever interesting” with her spouse and the job decisions up in the air right now. Eve is now realizing that this time in her life is serving a purpose for her. When her spouse has made good decisions in the past, she usually says “I hate it when you’re right!” A great phrase to practice instead of saying you are wrong (as he never believes that he is and she is right sometime too) could be “You may be right.” There is no defensiveness or criticism in this statement. Eve loved this and could hardly wait to use it.

How has being honest with yourself this week changed how you feel about yourself?

“More relaxed and definitely more empowered! It is surprisingly less work than hiding things. I feel more in control and definitely prouder of myself even when I am not perfect.”

 How is not being perfect changing your life?

“It seems less important that it used to be. It was always the barometer of where I needed to be.”

What will you do this week to commit to this honest path of yours?

“To continue to be honest with myself and write down what I am eating no matter what it is.”

 Come back next week to see Eve honestly on her way to the bottom of it all!

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