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Posts Tagged ‘spirituality’


Imagine
it is one year from now.
You are writing a letter to someone who really cares about your well being and success, and sharing with them all the GREAT things that have happened this past year. Your business has taken off, you are out of debt and making more money than ever, the kids are thriving, your marriage is stronger than ever, and your health is at an all time high. These are just a few of the things you share that have happened throughout the year.

Take time to reflect on how you would like your life to transpire over this next year, thinking about all the key areas of your life. Then write a letter to someone – not to send, but keep for yourself – telling them about it as if it has already become.

The future is now and now is the time to set the intention for your dream future. How do YOU want it to look? How will you feel in this future? What has changed? Not just on the outside, but on your inside in this future?

You deserve all that you can dream up for your future so dream BIG! This is your template. Everything IS Possible!

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Man washing dishes

Man washing dishes (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Remember the times when the teacher did roll call in class and the answer after your name was called was “present”? You were fairly present at the moment you heard your name. I don’t know about you, I was somewhere else for most of high school.

Today BEing present actually shows up by participating in the moment you are in, completely. Multi-tasking be damned, just doing one thing at a time and not wandering off in body or mind to another task, problem or issue. This is not always easy, but possible.

Are you willing to practice? Start with doing a mundane chore like the dishes or sweeping the floor. While you are doing it concentrate on the actual washing/sweeping. “Get the corners.” “Flip the dish and scrub that spot”. How long before you were thinking about dealing with the kids or heading out to do other chores or maybe even adding another task while you are doing this one, like calling a friend or checking your email?

Caught you! I knew it, lots of you are like me! HA! When I want to let go of the turmoil in my head or the dreaded to-do list, I start by thinking I just want to BE. My to-BE at the moment is just to wash the dishes and when other things filter in, I note it then clear my mind to the task at hand.

It is really incredibly relaxing to do only one thing at a time. Meditative even.When did we get so busy? Why do we think that if we are only done ONE thing we must be lazy or inefficient?

Life is short and we ALL need to slow down a bit and just BE. This IS the good life and “Life is too short to be anything but happy!”

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A sweet chestnut forest in the swiss alps(Ticino)

A sweet chestnut forest in the swiss alps(Ticino) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

There have been days as of late that I find myself standing in the middle of a room spinning. Not the kind you do as a kid with your arms wide looking up to the sky with puffy clouds and the sun peaking through. The kind where you can’t decide what to do next. I do know that this is temporary. My environment is not optimal at the moment with moving boxes everywhere and none of my “STUFF” anywhere nearby or handy.

Then there are moments where I do not feel connected to much of anything. This is a fairly rare event. Usually if I am tired or overwhelmed this is a possible outcome to just being DONE! An escape I think.

Now when I am grounded there are decisions to be made and they happen easily. Things to be done and are. Calls to be made and loads of to-dos which are systematically checked of the list and on I go with no real thought to it. When I am grounded all is really quite right in my world.

The floating, spinning me needs help at times and that is where the important stuff shows up. All I need do is realize that I am not grounded and I feel out of sorts in any way and I can ground myself. I have read books on the subject and I can tell you there are many. The simplest one I have found is Karla McLaren’s “your AURA and your CHAKRAS – The Owner’s Manual”.

If you are not sure about all this stuff or it seems BUNK to you take a moment to reflect a time when someone else was “in your space” or seemed to be “plugged  in” to you and drained all your energy. Or how you feel walking in nature or playing frisbee on the lawn or in a park. Part of that is about being grounded as well as doing something you are enjoying.

Having a bad moment go stick your hands in the garden and pull some weeds. Go for a stroll where the terra firm is below you not below the cement.  Stand on the ground and imagine your feet are like trunks of a tree and send a strong root system into the ground. There are some real lessons on how to ground yourself in this book and there are even grounding mats available out there to buy that are supposed to have a similar affect.

The point in all of this is to know when you are not grounded and find a way to get there. Look, even if this stuff still seems like “BUNK” to you. Take the time to check your presence in the moment and if you are not there, but somewhere else- take the time to breathe and notice where you are and what are you doing and connect yourself to that moment. Staying in the present is a great way to ditch the past and not get hung up in a future that has not happened yet.

At this moment I am writing a thought to those of you who have taken the time to read this thought. That is all, no more. Enjoy being grounded!

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A stone sculpture of Laozi, located north of Q...

Image via Wikipedia

Lao Tzu said, “When I let go of who I am, I become what I might be.”

So when you take a good long look in the mirror and connect with your truest self, who are you right now?

This can depend on how open you are to outside information what that “who” description will look like.

It could be a physical description with all the added stuff that you have done so far in life.

It could be who you believe you have become because of all the stuff you have done or experienced so far in this life.

Some would claim to be “a child of God” likely based on a religious background or education.

Yet others will say “I am God” or “I am all things” based on spiritual practices.

I think when Lao Tzu made that statement he left it to each of us to figure out exactly where we are so that we can let it go to allow new information that can bring us to something more.

We may not have a single clue of what “MORE” could possibly look like, but to be curious is all it would take to let go of that knowing for something new.

Are you curious?

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Life has a way of showing us the way,

which may rarely be where we were heading.

Know that you are never alone on this path…gratefully.

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A dear friend mentioned that self esteem comes from our parents. This was not news to me as I thought it was about our sense of value and that it most likely came from our parents…they/we are always the culprits. More importantly and specifically it is from being consciously listened to with eye contact. This sounds simple right? Not so simple these days. The busier we are the more things we are doing at the same time fracturing our attention from others. Not on purpose as if we don’t care, we just feel the pressure of time bearing down on us and are not present in the moment.

How about when you are chatting on the phone with a friend, are you doing the dishes or feeding the dog? I have noted that there have been times when I have been doing several things simultaneously and stopped to wonder what I was doing. Writing is one thing that I do not or maybe cannot do at the same time as anything else. Working with clients is another time I can stay focused on just the other person, but as that is mostly over the telephone eye contact is rarely a part of it. Listening with intention becomes primary and equally effective when the voice is all you have. Meditation is another but almost all else it is a real effort to stay focused on just one thing, or person.

Okay, go back. Go way back (for some of us it may feel like an eternity) to when you were a child. What kind of attention did your mom give you? Was your mom attentive to you when you were a wee one toddling around? For some, you may answer “of course she was!” But for many you either hope she was, don’t know or are sure she was not.

Mom may have been overwhelmed with many children and depended on older siblings to help take care of your needs or maybe even off at work before you were even one year old. Things have changed and moms get to stay home longer than say thirty years ago. Is it possible she was at home baking cookies when you got home from school? Or was she frantically trying to get everything in the house done like laundry and supper then baths and snacks with no real time to even read a book and tuck you in with a big hug.

Was there real time for listening? Can you envision in your mind’s eye her looking into yours with loving care and attention? Some of you can and some of you are getting a little uncomfortable now and maybe even a bit resentful. This is not my goal here. It’s about how we all can make a difference for others while we go along in our day. How can we affect our children’s, parents, friends and associates lives? One person at a time we can raise their self-esteem, their sense of personal value by giving them a small moment of your time.

If you don’t think that listening has value, just go back and think about someone who did – maybe your dad, grandparent, neighbor, relative, teacher or friend. When they took the time to really give you that care and attentive listening – how did you feel? I know that I felt special. I felt worthwhile. I felt wanted. I felt cared about. I felt loved! I no longer felt invisible in the world, even if just for a moment. Somebody thought that what I had to say was important. It felt GREAT!

Even just eye contact with a stranger walking by can more often than not elicit a smile of knowing. Knowing that they really are alive and seen by at least one other person can lift their spirit. We can go along our days unconsciously hardly seeing another person or we can make a decision that we matter enough, others matter enough to give them the time and care to stop, look and listen.

If you want to lift the SPIRIT through the self esteem of our world one person at a time, please forward this post on.

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It is important to remember that we are energy. Einstein told us that. And energy cannot be created or destroyed, it just changes form. Rhonda Byrne

What does your energy feel like today? Does it feel warm and fuzzy or overwhelmed and difficult, electric and vibrating, exhausted and dragging or calm and relaxed? Let me know how you feel.

How does your energy look? Black and cold, red and raging or brown and boring…white and illuminating or maybe yellow and cozy, how about bright and light you tell me…

Do you depend on a hit of energy from a power drink, coffee, chocolate or some outside source instead of from within?

You have a choice and if you want support on where to go from here or how to focus that energy in the way you want, well I have a tele-forum for you!

Check it out on the events page or just click here!

https://tammyrowlandcoaching.wordpress.com/upcomingevents/

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Don Juan DeMarco

Image via Wikipedia

“There are four questions of value in life…

What is sacred?

Of what is the spirit made?

What is worth living for,

and what is worth dying for?

The answer to each is the same.

Only love.”

(Don Juan deMarco – 1995)

-Johnny Depp

How would you answer each question?

I would love it if you can add them to the comments.

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Time…how is it treating you?

Does time get away from you? Is there enough time in your day…your Life? Do you do the things you really want to do? Is your time filled with other peoples priorities? Is there just too much to do in the 24 hours of your day? Is it all you can do to not pull the blankets over your head because your day is already overwhelming and you have not even put your feet on the floor yet?

I used to feel overwhelmed every day. I said “yes” before thinking about what I was saying “no” to. This left me with resentment, exhaustion and completely overwhelmed. In the end no time left for me or what was important to me. What energy could I possibly have left to enjoy what was important to me? NONE!

Have you taken some time recently to do absolutely nothing? Spending it wistfully waiting for the calm in your mind? Listening to your breath? Slowly coming to the present moment…the moment when it is only the stillness of your body and mind in sync with that particular moment of time. Sitting comfortable or maybe laying on the floor or on a blanket on the ground under a tree. Breathe in through your nose, to the count of 4 – hold for a count of 4, blow out through your mouth to the count of 4. Again…and again…

Is it not working yet? Keep going – until you feel the little hair on your top lip move from the in breath and the air over your lips on the out. Until you feel the inhale deep in the lower parts of your lungs as it expands on every breath in and drops on the exhale. This may not be easy but it is simple – awareness – thoughtfulness. When you finally get the hang of it you can enjoy the peace of that moment and notice what enters your mind. Acknowledge it and set it free coming back to counting every time.

When you feel fully relaxed you may open your eyes and notice what is around you. Your ability to focus sharpens through this process so things you see will seem brighter and clearer. Ideas will be quite vivid and formed. You can feel clearly connected to your intuition within this space.

I was quite amazed how I felt at first! The true calmness of my mind was unexpected. My body was relaxed but I had not experience such quiet in my head…not gerbils running amok on the wheels in my head. I needed more of this feeling, but it took many times and some years before my mind emptied so regularly I had to check in to be sure that it was still working! It worked overtime for decades!

This practice allowed me to figure out what was important to me. How was I going to simplify so that I could live in a way that was in line with what I wanted…not what the rest of the world seemed to want from me. I needed the peace in my head to give me space to hear what the Universe, my Higher Power or God had in store for me. My ideas were not working so well so I needed to learn how to turn ME off. Decisions come easier, as well. This practice was a great start to that process. It gave me…time. I gratefully took it.

I believe that anyone can learn how to do this. I am sure that some of you are masters at this, I am still a novice to be sure. I am not a silent retreat person, although I have heard of people who go on these retreats for up to ten days! I am not ready for that but I can sit and read for an entire day under the umbrella on the back deck only occasionally talking to my dog, Max. Looking up to watch the bird at the feeder two feet away or a bee collecting pollen from the flowers just beyond my knees can give me an incredible moment of delight. I can enjoy watching the sheets flap in the wind on the clothes line knowing that they will be fresh and crisp on our bed tonight. The full enjoyment of many such moments are meditation to me as all else leaves my mind in peace…these are the moments that remind me to live in the moment.

“This too shall pass” was not a statement made for only the uncomfortable or difficult moments. It is also for those moments of pure joy that will pass onto the regular moments of life. When we get really good at living, there can be an incredible peace that hits us when we can relish the wonderfulness in the  moments we are living – as they are lived. Now that is perfection! I don’t expect to get to perfection, but life can feel perfect one moment at a time – maybe a couple of times in my day. For now that feels pretty perfect to me!

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Be Happy

Image via Wikipedia

“There comes a time in your life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it. You surround yourself with people who make you laugh. Forget the bad, and focus on the good. Love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don’t. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living.” Unknown

This quote says so much to me. I used to be ‘in’ the drama and maybe even created a great deal of it early on in life. I didn’t know how not to or even that I had a choice. What a wonderful revelation that it was possible to remove myself from the drama in other peoples life, even some that were family, unfortunately. Life is much simpler without it and full of peace and joy.

I can choose to love everyone from a distance. I can choose to detach in a loving way when they are in my space if I cannot actually move myself physically. This is all about choice. How terrific is that. This is something that took me over 40 years to figure out and gratefully I did. I am not saying that I am perfect at this in any way, as I can slip up when my cup is not full. I am more likely to react vs. respond when I am tired. The deal is to know where I am at – and to make good choices based on what I want, knowing this information first.

Surrounding myself with folks that make me happy and laugh out loud is important to me. I can love them for who they are and be grateful for all that they give me unconditionally. This is much harder with folks that have the same blood as myself. It is much more work to discern the difference between what is right and what is necessary when it comes to who I spend my time with.

Life is too short not to enjoy it. I am happy most of the time. This does not mean I do not fall down occasionally. Actually there are tons of scars on my knees from doing so, but today I know I can just get up and try again, differently. I have enough life behind me to prove it to myself. I also expect that I will make more mistakes, but hopefully not as many as when I was young. Experience has taught me a few things. If I didn’t make more mistakes I probably didn’t try anything new or take any risks or been brave.

Life is good and being happy is better than being miserable. I know you have it in you to be happy, too. Hey, maybe you are and I am preaching to the choir! I hope so as it is so much more fun and others want to hang with the happy folks! I suspect we are already happy together somewhere in the Universe! Have a good one!

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