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Posts Tagged ‘Weight loss’

[tweetmeme source=trcoaching only_single=false]Happy New Year!
What do you want to do with 2011?
Have you made room in it for some positive change – a gift to yourself?
Invest some time to discover your passion with the thought-provoking questions below.
Feel free to share them with your friends and family as I have.

Your friendship and support has meant a great deal to me this year and for that I thank you from the bottom of a very grateful heart.

May 2011 be full of Peace, Love and more Joy than you could possibly keep to yourself.

What was the smartest decision you made in 2010?

What is the biggest piece of unfinished business still left from 2010?

What choices did you make in 2010 that you do not want to repeat?

Who made an important impact on you in 2010?

Who do you want to thank or express gratitude/appreciation to? How?

What relationship needs more attention in 2011?

What aspects of your health, appearance and habits need more attention in 2011?

What word would best describe your finances in 2010?
Where did you waste money in 2010?

What area of your finances do you want most to clear up in 2011?

What one thing do you need to do or say that would have made 2010 feel complete?

What did you learn about yourself in 2010 that will help guide you in the New Year?

What value/passion did you live this year?

For what problems must you ask for solutions?

In what areas would you benefit with more education?

Did you feel like you had enough support in 2010?
If not, where could you have used more support?

Are you willing to ask for that support and how will you do so?

Did you have fun in 2010? How can you bring more fun into your life?

What was your biggest high in 2010? What was your low for 2010?

Did you have a theme for the year?

If so how did it guide you? Moving on to 2011… My theme for 2011 is…

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[tweetmeme source=trcoaching only_single=false]Eve has been struggling with her weight for years so it makes perfect sense that actually getting to the bottom if it all takes more than one week! Last week her defensiveness with the weigh in staff member came from her feelings about all this change. A way to stand up for herself, I suppose. It was not so surprising that the following week there was no criticism for what was in her food journal even though it wasn’t perfect.

Recently as Eve has been more attentive to her weight loss she hoped for some notice from others, like her mom who knew of her recent efforts. It had frustrated and actually hurt that her mom said nothing at all about it. This week while sitting over coffee her mom mentioned how terrific Eve looked and was sorry she hadn’t quite figured out how to say it before now. Even though Eve was grateful for the encouragement that mom had noticed, she realized that it was no longer important if others noticed, but more so what she herself thought and felt. Eve said, “I feel in control of my life again! I feel good!”

Where Eve felt neglected by a good friend in the recent past, she found out it was not about her but her friend had been going through something and was now ready to talk to her about it. These things confirmed to Eve that it is not always about her but that maybe she just has gotten lonely and missed her friends company.  

Why are these things all different today?

 I just feel better about myself and don’t need others to fill a void I once felt I had.

The biggest change to be revealed! Eve’s entire life she has never mentioned her weight…to ANYONE! The joke in her family was that if they wanted to know how much she weighed they would have to do it upon her death, but not before. There was a moment this week – let’s say an opportunity for her to be completely honest.

Eve and her beloved were sitting with friends over coffee (lots of coffee dates this week!) and for some reason that never happened before someone asked about her weight. He was most concerned about his daughter’s health and had noticed her steady weight loss. It happened like this.

Eve, do you weight about 140 pounds?

No, actually 145!

She saw her husband’s brow lift and thought he was going to fall off his chair.

I asked her how she felt about saying it out loud.

“Who cares accept yourself and who are you fooling except yourself. He was shocked that I said my weight, but didn’t care about the number. He said that he doesn’t, never did and never will ever care about how much I weigh and that I have to deal with it. I thought it was a big deal and it wasn’t. I could hardly wait to tell you!”

“I have had tough things to deal with and I am more aware of my reactions to them. Worry has been an issue for me forever about my kids when they were young and now that they are adults as well as my husband’s work. Today I am better equipped to deal with worry and am handling it better…whichever way the wind blows. I am better at shaking myself out of bad or heavy thoughts. I have become amazing at ‘you may be right!’ I ask myself ‘How important is it for me to be right?’ Who really cares anyway?”

“Honesty really has removed my defensiveness and need to be right!” This is a great way to end today and I know that Eve has more growth in front of her, but the big stuff for now is behind her and the real work is staying on top of it until it becomes just who she is. If any of these issues that Eve has gone through sound familiar to you, a coach may be of assistance to you. Drop me a line and let me know what you think and how honest are you with yourself today?

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[tweetmeme source=trcoaching only_single=false]After being honest with me last week about her REAL “closet eating” issues, today we find out how she worked through her week with food.

The first thing Eve told me was that she wrote down everything, not leaving one morsel out! As she has been weighing is at a weight loss clinic for several months, she went in with all of it in hand. Eve had a day where she needed a fix and ate a box of chocolates and wrote it down as well.  The woman on the other side of the counter was quite critical about what her week. Eve went on to describe the woman as not so perfect herself and somewhat pushy, cocky and arrogant.

I asked if the woman may have been reacting to her defensiveness about what she had done. Quite possibly she said, as they had always been kind in the past. It had been uncomfortable to show her actions on paper to someone else which made her feel like she had to defend herself. Calming down she was able to mention her commitment to herself and felt more power and on another occasion had only a sliver of pie with no desire to sneak more. The sign on her fridge door was a constant reminder that it was “Just for Today” she needed to stay focused on with food.

Had she any new thoughts this week as she moved along her path to being honest with herself? Eve mentioned that she had been a pleaser all her life and worked very hard to make others happy. Now she realized that she is a good person, and needs to make her priority her own happiness. The sign that she was “good enough” last week was a great reminder as well. Eve says she walks a little prouder and everything she does is important, not menial. Everyone’s job is equally important.

Life is “ever interesting” with her spouse and the job decisions up in the air right now. Eve is now realizing that this time in her life is serving a purpose for her. When her spouse has made good decisions in the past, she usually says “I hate it when you’re right!” A great phrase to practice instead of saying you are wrong (as he never believes that he is and she is right sometime too) could be “You may be right.” There is no defensiveness or criticism in this statement. Eve loved this and could hardly wait to use it.

How has being honest with yourself this week changed how you feel about yourself?

“More relaxed and definitely more empowered! It is surprisingly less work than hiding things. I feel more in control and definitely prouder of myself even when I am not perfect.”

 How is not being perfect changing your life?

“It seems less important that it used to be. It was always the barometer of where I needed to be.”

What will you do this week to commit to this honest path of yours?

“To continue to be honest with myself and write down what I am eating no matter what it is.”

 Come back next week to see Eve honestly on her way to the bottom of it all!

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[tweetmeme source=trcoaching only_single=false]

I know what you are thinking. Monster’s only eat little children after their parents have tucked them snugly in their beds. Nope that is not the monster I am talking about today. I am talking about the monster in the closet! Check this out…what do you think about this?

Do you have a diet that looks anything like these?

All sugar no vegetables

High carbohydrates low protein

All dairy no fruit

Tons of meat no veggies

Only prepackaged food no whole food

All wasted calories with not near enough healthy stuff!

How is that affecting your body?

When we think of diet we think of only what we ingest –through our mouths.

What about what you take in through your ears?

How is that affecting your spirit?

How about this diet? 

All talk no listening

Lots of gossip no real connecting

Only negativity no positivity

Maybe high values but low standards

To busy hiding to be vulnerable

And the list goes on…

This is a diet that will affect who you really are on the inside, don’t you think? It may even affect how you treat your body, feeding it physical rubbish while you take in all that mental junk. With all the corners being full of life limiting garbage, how much room is there for things that can feed you well?

I can say that the more I was in the negative space of a crappy marriage, the more I fed my body empty calories making me feel even emptier as I was never satisfied.  I have never seen a well balanced person who is 50 pounds overweight unless they are unwell physically. I used to eat those emotions…or might I just say feed the monster inside that only wanted chocolate and cookies. That monster never said “May I have a carrot?” Nope the monster loves sugar, fat and carbs. Nary a veggie or apple in sight!

So if you look into your cupboards and fridge and only see the “monster’s” food, you may want to see what your mental diet has been lately. How do you think it is affecting you?

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